There once was a lady from Salem
                            
                    Who used to take cocks and inhale 'em.
                            The fruits of these feats:
                            Pubic hairs from her teeth
                            
                    Were saved until Fall when she'd bale 'em.
                            

               A certain professor named Yarrow 
               Had trouble seducing a sparrow. 
                    When he'd given up hopin' 
                    He pried her jaws open, 
               And filled up her bill with his marrow. 

There was a young lady named Sue 
            Who preferred a stiff drink to a screw. 
                But one leads to the other, 
                And now she's a mother--- 
            Let this be a lesson to you. 

There was a fat turkey named Sam,
Who gobbled whenever he ran.
He came out of the bush,
Presenting his tush,
And was shot up the arse by a man.

There once was a baker of Nottingham,
Who in making eclairs would put snot in 'em.
When he ran out of snot,
He would, like as not,
Take his pecker and jack off a shot in 'em.