Mary had a little sheep,
And with this sheep
She went to sleep.
The sheep turned out
To be a ram
And Mary had a little lamb!

There once was a man from Kartomb
Who was exceedingly fond of the womb.
He thought nothing finer
Than the human vagina,
So he kept three of four in his room 

               There was a young man from Aberdeen 
               Who invented a jerking machine. 
                    On the twenty-fifth stroke 
                    The goddamn thing broke 
               And beat his balls into a cream. 
                                                  

                    The Bishop of Solomons diocese
                            
                    Was stricken with elephantiasis,
                            The public beheld
                            His balls as they swelled
                            
                    By paying exorbitant priocese.
                            

               There was a young man from Aberdeen 
               Who invented a jerking machine. 
                    On the twenty-fifth stroke 
                    The goddamn thing broke 
               And beat his balls into a cream.