"My purpose here is to clearly demonstrate to all concerned that you are
 indeed insane; so that all doctors, policemen and other persons of
 authority will be shown to their professional satisfaction the truth of
 my statements. Please, do not change colour while I am talking to you."
                        -- MC 900ft Jesus, "Tiptoe through the Inferno"

Anyalyzing humour is like dissecting a frog: nobody enjoys it, and
       the frog usually dies as a result.

"I've been seeing spots in front of my eyes."
"Have you seen a doctor?"
"No, just spots." 

"User error. Replace user and press any key to continue."
                        -- Unknown

The internet is a great way to get on the net 

    - Bob Dole, Republican presidential candidate