Q: Why do women bleed and get cramps every month?
A: Because they deserve it.

A young man was staying on a farm with his uncle and aunt for the summer. 
One morning the aunt and uncle walked in the kitchen and the young man was 
drinking an extremely large glass of milk. The young man said "I took
the liberty of milking your cow this morning!" He then continues and says 
"it took me a while to get her started up. She must be old and stubbly." 
The uncle says with a confused look " Um son we don't have a cow...We have 
a bull!"

President Clinton, returning from a campaign stop in Arkansas, is climbing the steps to board 
Air Force One. Under each arm he is carrying a souvenir of his trip -- a live razorback. At 
the top of the jetway, he is met by the guard, a Marine sergeant, who issues a crisp salute.
"I'd salute you back, Sergeant," says the President, "but as you can see, I've got my hands 
full."
"Yes, sir," replies the sergeant. "Very nice pigs, sir. Very nice pigs."
"Why, these aren't pigs," the President responds. "These are RAZORBACKS!"
"Yes, sir -- razorbacks. Sorry, sir."
"Yup," Clinton continues. "Got this one for Chelsea, and this one for Hillary."
The sergeant replies: "Very good trade, sir -- very good trade." 

Two nuns go to a restaurant to have dinner. They notice Rocky
Mountain Oysters on the menu and wondered what that was.
They ask the waiter who replies "Oh Sister, those are nuts." 
She answers "Do you mean like the kind you crack with a rock?"
"No. The kind you rock on a crack." 

"The Seven Dwarfs were all in bed feeling Happy-then he got out of bed
so they felt Grumpy instead....."