I've just got some awful news.

A friend of mine is in danger of losing his license
to practice medicine. He's being accused of having
sex with some of his patients.

It's such a stupid waste! He was the best veterinarian in town. 

This is pretty close to an actual sales call I received.
The sales person's name has been changed. The company name
has not. I think we'll stick with our current provider.

Bob: Hello, I'm Bob ______ from AT&T, and I'm calling to let
you know about the Internet services we offer. Do you have a
minute to...
Me: I'm kind of busy right now, but if you could just email me
the information I'll call you back if I'm interested. My address is...
Bob: Could I have your fax number? We're behind a firewall, so our
email doesn't always get through. 

   One morning following a tiff, I put my pants on too roughly & ripped
   the seam along the fly. I glared at my wife and said "I'll wear these
   today so everyone in the Office will know what I have to put up with."
   
   She said, "No, I'll repair them. I don't want them to know what I have
   to put up with."