I know why the sun never sets on the British Empire: God wouldn't trust an
                                     Englishman in the dark.

                                       - - - Duncan Spaeth

Women have half the money and all the 
Pussy and still are not happy...

Sent by Eric

The secret of success is sincerity.
Once you can fake that, you've got it made. 

"Oh yes, for dinner we had an amazing meal which consisted of coagulated
 cholesterol cooked in a mixture of cholesterol and cholesterol, covered in
 ground cholesterol and cooked, then served with a cholesterol sauce and a
 sprinkler of cholesterol in the middle of the table in case it's not heavy
 enough.  You could feel your arteries closing up just looking at it."
                        -- Peter Gutmann, in alt.sysadmin.recovery

"The Irish gave the bagpipes to the Scotts
as a joke, but the Scotts haven't seen the joke yet." 

Oliver Herford.