A certain young man of St. Paul
                            
                    Consistently practiced withdrawal.
                            This quaint predilection
                            Created such friction,
                            
                    He soon had no foreskin at all.
                            

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Timed out, plum blossom.

A crooner who lived in Lahore
Got his balls caught in a door.
Now his mezzo soprano
Is rather piano
Though he was a loud basso before.

A parson who lived near Cremorne 
               Looked down on all women with scorn. 
                    E'en a boy's white, fat bum 
                    Could not make him come, 
               But an old man's piles gave him the horn. 

There was a young fellow named Simon
Who tried to discover a hymen.
But he found every girl
Had relinguished her pearl
In exchange for a solitaire diamond.