According to a study conducted by Kaiser Permanente, 
prostitutes can suffer from post-traumatic stress disorder on a 
par with veterans of the Vietnam war. I think I speak for a lot of 
men when I say, "are there still volunteer spots available in this 
study?" 

A lady who was known as Churchill's main rival in parliament was giving a 
speech. Churchill, with his usual enthusiasm for his rival, dozed off 
while the lady was speaking. She stopped her speech and awoke Sir Winston 
by yelling, "Mr. Churchill, must you sleep while I talk?" Churchill 
sleepily replied, "No, ma'am. I do so purely by choice."

Once on a Southwest flight, the pilot said, "We've reached our cruising
altitude now, and I'm turning off the seat belt sign. I'm switching to
autopilot, too, so I can come back there and visit with all of you for
the rest of the flight."