If you laid all of the lawyers in the world, end to end, on the 
equator...It would be a good idea to just leave them there. 

There's so much comedy on television. Does that cause comedy in the
   streets?
   -- Dick Cavett, mocking the TV-violence debate

Never ruin an apology with an excuse. 

    - Kimberly Johnson

Speech was divided into four parts that the inspired
               priests know.  Three parts, hidden in deep secret, humans   
               do not stir into action; the fourth part of Speech is what  
               men speak.                                                  

                                                    Rig Veda (B.C. 1200-900?)

Under the most rigorously controlled conditions of pressure, temperature,
volume, humidity, and other variables, the organism will do as it damn well
pleases.
        -- Harvard's Law