"A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that
       you don't need it." -- Bob Hope

"Look, buddy:  Windows 3.1 IS A General Protection Fault."
                        -- The BOFH excuse server

No computer has ever been designed that is ever aware of what it's doing; but
most of the time, we aren't either.  -- Marvin Minsky

"Interestingly, most Unix utilities have a command line option which
 will cause the system to rip the user's legs off and beat them to death
 with the soggy ends. This is often the default behaviour."
                        -- Bruce Murphy

"I'm convinced that, if you could decode the 'unused' bits of our DNA,
 they'd read:

        This is a test, please ignore

 or perhaps:

        The Elder Ones make no warranty of any kind with regard to
        this material, including, but not limited to, the implied
        warranties or merchantability and fitness for a particular
        purpose"
                        -- Malcolm Ray, uhaa032@sun.rhbnc.ac.uk