Spam Haiku



Pink tender morsel,
Glistening with salty gel.
What the hell is it?

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Ears, snouts and inards,
A homogeneous mass.
Pass another slice.

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Old man seeks doctor.
"I eat SPAM daily", says he.
Angioplasty.

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Highly unnatural,
The tortured shape of this "food":
A small pink coffin.

 - author unknown

A pretty young maid from Australia 
            Painted her ass like a dahlia. 
                The colour was fine, 
                And so the design, 
            But the smell was still naturalia! 

                    Most all husbands can testify
                            
                    To a wedding they cannot deny.
                            'Cause they know where and when
                            They got married, but then,
                            
                    What exactly escapes them is why.
                            

A modest young girl named Oola
Once donned a grass skirt to dance Hula
A cow ate the grass
Exposing her ass
Now she's no longer modest but coola 

                    A young baseball fan named Miss Glend
                            
                    Was the home team's best rooter and friend,
                            But for her the big league
                            Never held the intrigue
                            
                    Of a bat with two ball at the end.