There was a young lady of Bicester
Who was a lot far nicer than her sister.
The sister would giggle
And wiggle and jiggle,
But this one would come when you kissed her. 

A stingy old man of St. Giles 
               Saved his shillings with miserly wiles. 
                    Just to save a few bob 
                    He would wipe with a cob, 
               And that way he got piles and piles! 

There was an old girl from the Azores

           whos cunt was covered in sores

           even the dogs in the street

           wouldn't sniff the green meat

           that hung in great chunks 

           from her drawers


                              RpR

Mary had a little lamb,
It's fleece was scarlet red.
The reason for this colour scheme
was the pick-axe in it's head.

There was a young man named Zerubbabel 
               Who had only one real, and one rubber ball. 
                    When they asked if his pleasure 
                    Was only half measure, 
               He replied, "That is highly improbable."