"A career in mathematics is the scholastic equivalent of [the] Vietnam War."
                        -- From the sig of Jake Kesinger

"That's the old American way
- If you got a good thing, then overdo it."

- Record Executive Phil Walden 

Lady Astor: "Mr. Churchill, you're drunk!" Winston Churchill:
       "Yes, and you, Madam, are ugly. But tomorrow, I shall be sober."

That's the trouble with engineers;
They're always trying to change things.

     - Dr. McCoy, Star Trek: the Motionless Picture 

* Only adults have difficulty with childproof bottles.