There was a young lady from Brussels 
            Who was proud of her vaginal muscles. 
                She could easily plex them 
                And so interflex them 
            As to whistle love songs through her bustles.

There once was a woman from Wheeling
Who had a funny feeling
So she laid on her back
And tickled her crack,
And peed all over the ceiling! 

            Remember those two of Aberystwyth 
            Who connected the things that they pissed with? 
                She sat on his lap 
                But they both had the clap, 
            And they cursed with the things that they kissed with. 

A disgusting young man named McGill 
               Made his neighbors exceedingly ill 
                    When they learned of his habits 
                    Involving white rabbits 
               And a bird with a flexible bill 

            Have you heard of the Widow O'Riley 
            Who esteemed her late husband so highly 
                That in spite of the scandal, 
                Her umbrella handle 
            Was made of his membrum virile.