The only good thing to ever come out of Oklahoma:

An empty greyhound.

In Montana, on the sight where Custer and his men had their asses handed 
to them by the Sioux, a huge mural is to be painted. The artist insists on 
complete secrecy.
When the mural is unveiled it shows an orgy of naked Indians screwing all 
over the prairie, and in the center a cow with a halo. The artist says the 
mural is a rendering of Custer's final thoughts - "Holy cow! Look at all 
them fuckin' Indians!"

A preacher was completing a temperance sermon: with great 
expression he said, "If I had all the beer in the world, I'd
take it and throw it into the river."

With even greater emphasis he said, "And if I had all the wine 
in the world, I'd take it and throw it into the river."

And then finally, he said, "And if I had all the whiskey in the 
world, I'd take it and throw it into the river." He sat down.

The song leader then stood very cautiously and announced with 
a smile, "For our closing song, let us sing Hymn # 365:
"Shall We Gather at the River."

Age        WHAT'S THE IDEAL AGE TO GET MARRIED?
        17         17
        25         25
        35         35
        48         48
        66         66

Boss, to four of his employees: "I'm really sorry,
but I'm going to have to let one of you go."

Black Employee: "I'm a protected minority."
Female Employee: "And I'm a woman."
Oldest Employee: "Fire me, buster, and I'll hit you with an
age discrimination suit so fast it'll make your head spin."

...To which they all turn to look at the helpless young,
white, male employee, who thinks a moment, then responds:
"I think I might be gay..."