Two animal rights protesters were protesting at the cruelty of sending 
pigs to a slaughterhouse in Bonn, Germany. Suddenly, all two thousand 
pigs broke loose and escaped through a broken fence, stampeding madly. 
The two hopeless protesters were trampled to death. 

A thief burst into a Florida bank one day wearing a ski mask and
   carrying a gun. Aiming his gun at the guard, the thief yelled,
   "FREEZE, MOTHER-STICKERS, THIS IS A F _ _ _-UP!" For a moment,
   everyone was silent. Then the snickers started. The guard completely
   lost it and doubled over laughing. It probably saved his life, because
   he'd been about to draw his gun. He couldn't have drawn and fired
   before the thief got him. The thief ran away and is still at large. In
   memory of the event, the bank later put a plaque on the wall engraved
   "Freeze, mother-stickers, this is a fxxk-up!"


  

CBS is making a movie based on Marcia Clark's book about
the OJ Simpson trial. Casting has not yet begun, but
Marlon Brando has expressed interest in playing the mountain
of evidence.