Beginning in February 1976 your assistance benefits will be
   discontinued... Reason: it has been reported to our office that you
   expired on January 1, 1976.
   -- Letter from the Illinois Department of Public Aid

In weightlifting, I don't think sudden, uncontrolled urination
       should automatically disqualify you.

"If you think C++ is not overly complicated, just what is a protected
 abstract virtual base pure virtual private destructor, and when was the
 last time you needed one?"

-- Tom Cargil, C++ Journal

Government doesn't work. 

     - Harry Browne 

"Blessed is he who expects nothing, for he shall never be
       disappointed." -- Jonathan Swift