Boot It
                                      
                          (to the tune of Beat It)
     
   
    You're processing some words when your keyboard goes dead,
    Ten pages in the buffer, should have gone to bed,
    The system just crashed, but don't lose your head,
    Just BOOT IT, just BOOT IT.

    Better think fast, better do what you can,
    Read the manual or call your system man,
    Don't want to fall behind in the race with Japan,
    So BOOT IT,

    Get the system manager to
    BOOT IT,     BOOT IT,
    Even though you'd rather shoot it.
    Don't be upset, it's only some glitch.
    All that you do is flip a little switch.
    BOOT IT,     BOOT IT,
    Get right down and restitute it.
    Don't get excited, all is not lost.
    CP/M, UNIX or MS/DOS
    Just BOOT IT, boot it, boot it, boot it...

    You gotta have your printout for the meeting at two,
    The system says your jobs at the head of the queue,
    Right then the thing dies but you know what to do,
    BOOT IT.

    You always get so worried when the system runs slow,
    And when it finally crashes, man you feel so low,
    But computers make mistakes (they're only human you know)
    So BOOT IT,

    Call the local guru to
    BOOT IT,     BOOT IT,
    Go ahead re-institute it.
    If you're not lucky, get the book off the shelf,
    But if you are, it'll do it itself.
    BOOT IT,     BOOT IT,
    Then go find the guy who screwed it!
    Operating systems are built to bounce back,
    Whether it's a Cray or a Radio Shack.

    BOOT IT!     BOOT IT!
  

                    There was a young man of Madras
                            
                    Who was fucking a girl in the grass,
                            But the tropical sun
                            Spoiled half of his fun
                            
                    By singeing the hair off his ass.
                            

There was a young fellow named Biddle 
               Whose girl had to teach him to diddle. 
                    She grabbed hold of his bow 
                    And said, "If you want to know, 
               You can try parting my hair in the middle." 

According to old Sigmind Freud,
Life is seldom so fully enjoied,
As in human coition
In every position
With the usual organs employed.

               I'd willingly fertilize Mary, 
               And watch for nine months her shape vary, 
                    From the very first day, 
                    To the child-birth display, 
               When her tits would turn into a dairy.