I'm not saying my wife talks too much or anything,
   But she uses a special SPF 30 sunblock for her tongue.

Advertising: The science of arresting the human intelligence long
   enough to get money from it
         Stephen Leacock

If the effort that went in research on the female bosom had
gone into our space program, we would now be running hot-dog
stands on the moon. 

"My mother said to me, "If you are a soldier, you will become a general. 
If you are a monk, you will become the Pope." Instead, I was a painter, 
and became Picasso." 

Pablo Picasso.

Nobody has so many friends that he can afford to lose one. 

                                       - Edward Abbey