Are you any relation to your brother Marv?

    -- Leon Wood, New Jersey Nets guard, to Steve Albert, Nets TV commentator

"President Bush has said that he does not need approval from the UN to 
wage war, and I'm thinking, well, hell, he didn't need the approval of 
the American voters to become president, either."

                                              - David Letterman

"I think I have it. A man talking sense to himself is no madder than a man
 talking nonsense not to himself."
"Or just as mad."
"Or just as mad."
"And he does both."
"So there you are."
"Stark raving sane."
                        -- Guildenstern, Rosencrantz,
                                "Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead"

"I was recently on a tour of Latin America,
and the only regret I have was that I didn't
study Latin harder in school so I could
converse with those people." 

    - J. Danforth Quayle, former U.S. Vice-President 

Reality is the only obstacle to happiness.