A star-gazing fellow named Flipper 
            Had a girl try to open his zipper. 
                As he stared at Orion, 
                The young girl was cryin' 
            As she found it was NOT a Big Dipper. 

There once was old Chinese drunk,
Who set sail away on his junk,
While dreaming of Venus,
He played with his penis,
Till he floated away in the spunk. 

            There once was a young boy named Steven 
            Who noticed his balls were uneven. 
                When he pulled on the right, 
                The left shot out of sight: 
            Not the effect Steve was keen on achievin'. 

Three things are certain

Death, taxes, and lost data.

Guess which has occurred.

               There was a fat man from Rangoon 
               Whose prick was mich like a balloon. 
                    He tried hard to ride her 
                    And when finally inside her 
               She thought she was pregnant too soon.