A wonderful fish is the flea, 
            He bores and he bites on me. 
                I would love, indeed, 
                To watch him feed, 
            But he bites me where I cannot see. 

There was a young man of Soho 
            Whose tastes were exceedingly low. 
                He said to his mother, 
                "Let us suck one another, 
            And swallow the seminal flow." 

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall
Eyed the girls and had a ball,
Lots of whistles, even a catcall,
Thus... Humpty had a great fall!

Then came the cold winter breeze
and Humpty's arse began to freeze...
though winter's sure to be a dreary thing... 
Let's wish Humpty a bouncy spring!

There was a young man of Soho 
            Whose tastes were exceedingly low. 
                He said to his mother, 
                "Let us suck one another, 
            And swallow the seminal flow." 

               There was a young colonel from Trent 
               Who lived in a lavender tent. 
                    He said that some sessions 
                    With interesting Hessians 
               Had taught him what war really meant.