Each man that Miss Jones chose to wed with, 
               She first liked to paint the town red with, 
                    For having made merry, 
                    She then became very 
               Aroused and fantastic in bed with. 

Said the whore whom they called Geraldine,
"When I think of the pricks that I've seen,
And all of the nuts
And the arseholes and butts
And bastards like you in between." 

There was a young fellow named Goff 
            Whose amusement was jacking it off 
                He pulled it so hard 
                It stretched out a yard. 
            And turned to bright blue and fell off.

There once was a monkey named Spunky,
Who was always referred to as chunky.
So he went on a diet,
He shouldn't have tried it.
He became anorexic and died.


Sent by Mike F.

There was a young girl of Spitzbergen
Where people all thought her a virgin
Till they found her in bed
With her quim very red
And the head of a kid just emerging