After the worldwide strike of the "I LOVE YOU VIRUS," reports are already 
coming in that the virus is mutating into several stages. Within the next 
few hours, expect to see: 

The original "I love you" virus 
The "I like you alot" virus 
The "You're nice, but I just want to be friends" virus 
The "Look, it was just a date...don't get clingy" virus 
The "Okay, I think its best if we don't have anymore contact" virus 
The "It was late, I was drunk, you were easy" virus 
The "Stop calling me, you unfeeling jerk" virus 
The "That's it, I hate you and your stupid dog" virus 

and finally, 

The "You have made an enemy today, prepare to be boarded" virus

Sign in a Japanese hotel room: 

    Please to bathe inside the tub. 

The Stanford Law Review runs the following quote on their masthead:
"For every thousand people hacking at the leaves of evil there is
one chopping at the roots."

-H.D. Thoreau

On their April Fools issue they ran the following:
"For every person hacking at the leaves of evil there
are a thousand smoking the stuff.