A very modest lady applied for a job at the factory where
   they made "Tickle me Elmo dolls". It was Friday and almost quitting
   time and hurriedly the boss told her to report for work on Monday. He
   quickly explained to her that she would be stationed on the assembly
   line just before the dolls were packed into boxes. On Monday they
   started up the line and within twenty minutes had to shut it down
   because one worker couldn't keep up. The boss went down the line to
   find the problem. The new employee was very busy trying to do her part
   but she had a bunch of dolls waiting for her. Closer examination
   showed that she was sewing little cloth bags containing two walnuts in
   the appropriate place on the dolls. The boss could not control his
   laughter and said, "Lady, I said to give each doll
   Two----Test----Tickles."

The owner of a small crossroads store in South Carolina was appointed 
postmaster. Over six months went by and not one piece of mail left towm. 
Deeply concerned, postal authorities in Washington wrote the postmaster to 
inquire why.
They received this short and simple explantion: "The bag ain't full yet."

   The newlywed couple were checking into the hotel. The new groom
   approached the desk clerk. He said he wanted the best for they were on
   their honeymoon. The clerk asked the man if he wanted the bridal.
   "No," he said, "I don't believe I'll need it. I'll just grab onto her
   ears and hold on 'til she gets used to it."

A furrier from the US goes to Helsinki to buy furs.
He arranges for a hooker to be sent to his room.

When they're done, he said, "I'm afraid my
Finnish isn't too good."

The hooker replied, "Your foreplay ain't all
that hot either."

Why do Jewish Women go for circumcised men?

Because they can't refuse anything with 10% off.