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Today's poems [2.7.05]

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"Remind me, dear," said Sir John Keith, 
            "As soon as I've finished my teeth, 
                To take down this glass 
                And examine my ass 
            From behind---and of course from beneath."
1.   Vote:    Category: Medicine Send this poem to a friend 



Part 9 of 12
   
                    One day he was dared to perform
                            
                    The William Tell Overture Storm,
                            But naught could dishearten
                            Our spirited Spartan,
                            
                    For his fart was in wonderful form.
2.   Vote:    Category: Send this poem to a friend 



Fool

I just got finished testing in school.
Now taking a nap I start to drool.
It drips off my chin
As my dreams begin.
My peers laugh; I feel like a fool!
3.   Vote:    Category: School and College Send this poem to a friend 



                    There was a young girl of Penzance
                            
                    Who boarded a bus in a trance.
                            The passengers fucked her,
                            Likewise the conductor.
                            
                    The driver shot off in his pants.
4.   Vote:    Category: Send this poem to a friend 



Pardon My French
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

The finest culture
  Comes from Frontz
And hoe-knee-swat-key
  Molly-ponce!

Sally learned
  To speak in French
She's now a dame
  And not a wench

Dick acquired
  That language fair
And now he's swayve
  And deb-an-err

Speaking French
  Will prove you're better
Show you've got a
  Rays-on-debtor

Read in French
   And sack-ray-blue!
You're sure to find
  Your tom-pair-doo

Write in French
  And you'll be famous
Just like muss-your
  Albert Camus

You can bet
  Your dairy-air
Your French will prove
  Your salve-war-fare

He who is
  A true believer
Shows his Gallic
  Joyed-a-fever

French cuisine
  Is all the rage
So drink Bored-O
  With soft from-age

Wear a little
  Black beret
And eat cross-ants
  With French calf-A

Then there's all
  That art you know
So speak bow-czar
  And art-new-foe

And what a joy
  To smoke Get-tans
While watching films
  That come from Cans

I guess it's not
  An easy job
To be a phony
  Stuck-up snob...

Such games in Frontz
  They also play
But there "c'est snob"
  To speak anglais!
5.   Vote:    Category: Foreign Send this poem to a friend


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