Where there's a will,
There's an inheritance tax.

"I think that's how Chicago got started. A bunch of people in New York 
said, 'Gee, I'm enjoying the crime and the poverty, but it just isn't
cold enough. Let's go west.'"

                                            - Richard Jeni

One of the reasons Jimmy Carter is so popular in the south is that he has no accent. 

God is not dead, he just moved to a better neighborhood.
(Unknown)

Hard work never killed anybody, 
but why take the chance? 
                            --Edgar Bergen