A nudist resort at Benares 
            Took a midget in all unawares. 
                But he made members weep 
                For he just couldn't keep 
            His nose out of private affairs. 

   You're lucky
   You had your chance
   I tried to fart,
   And shit my pants!


  

Said a swinging young girl named Lyth
Whose virtue was largely a myth,
"Try as hard as I can,
I can't find a man
That it's fun to be virtuous with." 

No matter how grouchy you're feeling,
You'll find the smile more or less healing.
It grows in a wreath
All around the front teeth -
Thus preserving the face from congealing.

               There was a young woman named Dottie 
               Who said as she sat on the potty, 
                    "It isn't polite 
                    To do this in sight, 
               But then, who am I to be snotty?"