Mary had a little watch,
She swallowed it one day.

She took a dose of Castor oil,
to pass the time away.

The oil, it did not work.
The time it did not pass.

So if you want to know what time it is,
You'll have to look up Mary's ass.

Sent by jerry

            There was a young man from Liberia 
            Who was groping a wench from Nigeria. 
                He said, "Yes, my pet, 
                Your panties are wet." 
            "Sorry, sir, that's my interior." 

                       Vendor's 12 Days of Christmas
     
   
On the 12th day of Christmas my vendor gave to me:

        12 days to set up
        11 acronyms
        10 more megahertz
        9 brand new standards
        8 more megs of RAM
        7 minor upgrades
        6 hidden features
        5 tons of docs
        4 new API's
        3 more months of waiting
        2 more SCSI drives

And a bug fix for Windows NT.

(c) 1993 The Bill Gates of Hell Society
  

Mary had a little lamb (The sad European version)

Mary had a little lamb,
its coat was full off fleas,
but even worse the little cunt
had foot and mouth disease.

Mary had a little lamb,
its mouth was full of blisters,
but now its on a bonfire,
with all its brothers and sisters.

Sent by Jack

There was an old harlot of Wick
Who was sucking a coal miner's prick
She said, "I don't mind
The coal dust and grime,
But the smell of your balls makes me sick."