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Today's poems [12.21.05]

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There was a young girl named Sapphire
Who succumbed to her lover's desire.
She said, "It's a sin,
but now that it's in,
Could you shove it a few inches higher?"

1.   Vote:    Category: Sex Send this poem to a friend




The Camel

The sexual needs of a camel
are greater than anyone thinks.
For once in a moment of passion
it attempted to ravish the Sphinx.

The Sphinx's posterior entrance
was clogged by the sands of the Nile,
which accounts for the hump on the camel
and the Sphinx's inscrutable smile :)

Sent by FLG

2.   Vote:    Categories: Historical Stuff, Animal World Send this poem to a friend




My face in the mirror
                isn't wrinkled or drawn;
        My house isn't dirty,
                the cobwebs are gone.
        My garden looks lovely,
                and so does my lawn;
        I think I might never
                put my glasses back on!

3.   Vote:    Category: Miscellaneous Send this poem to a friend




There was an old maid from Bruton 
               Who had the bad habit of pootin'. 
                    Her sphincter was weak, 
                    Her wind she couldn't keep--- 
               This tootin' old spinster from Bruton. 

4.   Vote:    Category: Elderly Send this poem to a friend




ROBIN HOOD

You've heard the tale of Robin Hood,
and how he did poor people good.
But there's more to this story,
of Sherwood forests pride and glory.
At night when all the robbing was done,
the merry men would have their fun.
In fact it would be fair to say,
the merry men were quite GAY.
As little John starts to unwind,
Robin takes it from behind,
and as they frolic in the grass,
Robin takes it up the arse. 
One day when they were all at play,
a cute maiden came their way.
She walked up to Friar Tuck and asked 
if he would like a FUCK.
Little John couldn't believe his ears,
she 's offering sex to al us queers.
As he recovers from the shock,
Robin presents her with his cock.
For Marian this was sheer bliss,
as he fullfilled her every wish.
When all was done she gave a whine.
Thanks boys for a lovely time.
But for this pleasure,
you must pay.
I've got pox have anice day.
Listen here said Friar Tuck,
we don't even give a fuck.
the jokes on you, you silly cow.
We've got AID's whose fucked now? 

Sent by Gina

5.   Vote:    Categories: Historical Stuff, Gays and Lesbians Send this poem to a friend



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