A worried young man from Stamboul
Discovered red spots on his tool.
Said the doctor, a cynic,
`Get out of my clinic!
Just wipe off the lipstick, you fool.'

There was an old woman'
     who lived in a shoe,
She had so many children
     that her cunt fell off!!

There was a young fellow named Biddle
Whose girl had to teach him to fiddle.
She grabbed hold of his bow
And said, "If you want to know,
You can try parting my hair in the middle." 

If the river was made of whiskey,
And I a diving duck,
I'd swim down to the bottom,
And drink myself back up.

Sent by Amy

There was an old harlot of Wick
Who was sucking a coal miner's prick
She said, "I don't mind
The coal dust and grime,
But the smell of your balls makes me sick."