A wide-bottomed girl named Trasket 
               Had a hole as big as a basket. 
                    A spot, as a bride, 
                    In it now, you could hide, 
               And include with your luggage your mascot. 

There once was a lady from Pinner
Whose boyfriend wanked on her dinner
She said if you please
I don't mind some cream teas
But I like my white sauce a bit thinner 

The Communist Party's Earl Browder 
               Was fucking a girl in a howda. 
                    The elephant's trunk 
                    Somehow got in her cunt 
               Which, they felt, made it terribly crowded. 

There was a young man from St. Paul's
Who read Harper's Bazaar and McCall's
Till he grew such a passion
For feminine fashion
That he knitted a snood for his balls. 

There once was a lady from Pinner
Whose boyfriend wanked on her dinner
She said if you please
I don't mind some cream teas
But I like my white sauce a bit thinner