I was at a party this weekend and a jokester, stifling a laugh said,
"Listen to this: One day, Moskowitz and Finkelstein were going to-"
At this, my Jewish friend, Al Cohen said, "Moskowitz
and Finkelstein; Moskowitz and Finkelstein; always two
Jews. Why do they have to be Jewish? Can't you tell the
joke with other nationalities involved? Why don't you
make them Chinese for a change?"
The jokester, sobered and embarrassed, said,
"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to offend. Here's the joke:
One day, Hong-lee Yang and Mao-chen Foo were going to the
synagogue to attend the bar mitzvah of Hong-lee Yang's nephew..."

The other day, while I was seeing my shrink, he asked me what 
I looked for in a woman.

Naturally I replied, "Big tits."

He said, "No, I meant for a serious relationship."

So I said, "Oh, seriously big tits."

"No, no, no. I mean what do you look for in the one woman you 
want to spend the rest of your life with?"

He looked at me kind of worried as I just sat there on his couch 
laughing until my gut hurt. "Spend the rest of my life with one 
woman? No woman's tits are that big."

When my husband and I were living in Memphis we ordered Duck
Breast from the local 5 star restaurant.  I like my duck
cooked rare, so I inquired, 'would that be rare duck?' The
waiter replied, 'No, it's just a regular  old duck -- local,
I think.'