"Life gets boring, someone invents another necessity, and once again we
 turn the crank on the screwjack of progress hoping that nobody gets
 screwed."

-- Larry Wall

"That's so when I forget how to spell my name, I can still
   find my #%@# clothes."
   - Stu Grimson, Chicago Blackhawks left wing, explaining why he
   keeps a color photo of himself above his locker

Ah, yes, divorce, from the Latin word meaning to rip out a
man's genitals through his wallet.
                 -Robin Williams

It is a privilege to present to you now the distinguished
virgin of Governor's Island...

"You're not playing klondike again are you?"
"No, it's a hallucination."
"Oh, ok. Put the 8 on the 9."
                        -- Ben Salmon, me, Ben