A dashing Rabbi from Peru
Was vainly attempting to screw
His wife said "Oi  vay"
If you keep up this way
The Messia will come before you

               A vice both obscene and unsavory 
               Holds the Mayor of Southhampton in slavery. 
                    With bloodcurdling howls 
                    He deflowers young owls 
               Which he keeps in an underground aviary. 

                    A geneticist living in Delft
                            
                    Scientifically played with himself,
                            And when he was done
                            He labeled it: Son,
                            
                    And filed it away on the shelf.
                            

There was a young lady of Michigan, 
                                        Who said, "Damn it! I've got the itch again." 
                                                      Said her mother, "That's strange, 
                                                      I'm surprised it ain't mange, 
                                        If you've slept with that son-of-a-bitch again." 

There once was old Chinese drunk,
Who set sail away on his junk,
While dreaming of Venus,
He played with his penis,
Till he floated away in the spunk.