There was a young fellow named Goff 
            Whose amusement was jacking it off 
                He pulled it so hard 
                It stretched out a yard. 
            And turned to bright blue and fell off.

There once was a gal named Lewinsky
   Who played on a flute like Stravinsky
   'Twas "Hail to the Chief"
   on this flute made of beef
   that stole the front page from Kaczynski.


  

There was a young peasant named Gorse 
               Who fell madly in love with his horse. 
                    Said his wife, "You rapscallion, 
                    That horse is a stallion--- 
               This constitutes grounds for divorce." 

               An innocent boy in Lapland 
               Was told that friggin' was grand. 
                    But at his first trial 
                    He said with a smile, 
               "I've had the same feeling by hand." 

There was a young lady of Spain 
Who took down her pants on a train. 
There was a young porter 
Saw more than he orter, 
And asked her to do it again.