I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as 
they get older, then it dawned on me . . . they  were cramming for their 
finals.

Never accept a drink from a urologist. 

    - Erma Bombeck

"When life hands you a lemon, say 'Oh yeah, I _like_ lemons, what else
 ya got??'"
                        -- Henry Rollins

We are ready for an unforeseen event that may or may not occur. 

    - Dan Quayle, Former U.S. Vice-President 

"Actually, an oxymoron is more along the lines of a moron with an OH+
 radical attached.  Since both morons and free radicals tend to bind
 strongly to the first interesting thing that comes along, this is a
 match made in heaven."
                        -- The Internet Oracle