There was a young man from St. Paul
               Who had really no scruples at all---
                    He would fart when he'd talk,
                    And shit when he'd walk,
               And at night throw it over the wall.

A sultan named Abou ben Adhem
Thus cautioned a travelling madam,
"I suffer from crabs
As do most us A-rabs,"
"It's alright," said the madam, "I've had 'em."

An aesthete from South Carolina
Had a cock that tinkled like china,
But while shooting his load
It cracked like old Spode,
So he's bought him a Steuben vagina.

               There once was a midwife of Gaul 
               Who had hardly no business at all. 
                    She cried, "Hell and damnation! 
                    There's no procreation--- 
               God made the French penis too small."

                              A chap down in Oklahoma 
                              Had a cock that could sing La Paloma, 
                                        But the sweetness of pitch 
                                        Couldn't put off the hitch 
                              Of impotence, size and aroma.