I am a limo driver and this Judi once, was totally impressed
with the  bar, the interior lights, the mirrored ceiling --
everything in the stretch-limo.  Then she noticed the TV. 
There was a show  she really wanted to see that evening and
asked me in all  seriousness: 'the TV *does* get cable, right?'

Old Simpson was a constant thorn in the side of the Parent-Teachers
Association, with his steadfast opposition to innovation. For one
thing, he was vociferously against the introduction of foreign
languages in the town's junior high school curriculum.
Waving his Bible high in the air, he shouted, "If English was good
enough for the prophets and the apostles, it's plenty good enough
for me." 

From the "Say What?" file -- true story: I'm taking two classes
this semester, one of which is Public Policy. Our professor is an
adjunct; nice lady, tries too hard. Anyway, a few weeks ago,
we're covering a chapter on environmental politics, and she casts
an overhead with facts and figures on some of the more powerful
environmental lobbying groups. Among them is the Audubon Society.
If you do not know what the Audubon Society is, then stop reading.

So one of the students asks, "What is the Audubon Society?"
(Bird watchers, if you ignored my previous instructions.) To
which the professor replies:

"I don't know, I think it's a group to protect that road in Germany."

It hits me like a spear. "She did not just say that, did she?" I think
to myself. I look up -- and she's serious.

"That's Auto-BAHN, not Audubon!" I reply, only to be drowned out by the
chorus of students in the back who are either laughing or yelling,
"Birds! Birds!"

"What?" she says.

I reply, "It's a group organized for the protection of birds."

She stays silent for a moment, then responds, "Well, what kind of bird
is an audubon, is it a spotted owl or something?"