"If all it takes is an infinite number of monkeys with typewriters, how come
 AOL haven't written any Shakespeare yet?"
                        -- from the sig of Andy Dingley, alt.hackers

If men could get pregnant, abortion would be a sacrament.

                                               -Gloria Steinam

Beginning in February 1976 your assistance benefits will be
   discontinued... Reason: it has been reported to our office that you
   expired on January 1, 1976.
   -- Letter from the Illinois Department of Public Aid

ON HIGHER EDUCATION
   College is a fountain of knowledge...and the students are there to
   drink.

I have the world's largest collection of seashells.  I keep it on all the
beaches of the world...  Perhaps you've seen it.