Try as I might though, I just can't seem to win many points with my
   wife. Just the other day she was reminding me of how often she had to
   ask for my help with our kids. Then she pointed out that the youngest
   had moved out over eight years ago. I smiled and said "OK, what would
   you like me to do next ?" Again -- nothing but cold icy silence. I
   just don't understand that woman at all.

Jerry Williams of Little Rock, Arkansas, was awarded $14,500 and medical
expenses after being bitten on the buttocks by his next door neighbor's 
beagle. The beagle was on a chain in its owner's fenced yard.  The award 
was less than sought because the jury felt the dog might have been just a 
little provoked at the time by Mr. Williams who was shooting it 
repeatedly with a pellet gun.

Alan tells me about his son and his son's new under-
wear with superheroes on it.  One morning he comes running
into the bedroom, grabs the front of his pants and annouces
proudly, "Ive got Superman in my pants, Daddy.  What have
you got in yours?"  Before checking, I turned to my wife,
"Well, how should I answer him?"  She was too busy laughing.