A parson who lived near Cremorne 
               Looked down on all women with scorn. 
                    E'en a boy's white, fat bum 
                    Could not make him come, 
               But an old man's piles gave him the horn. 

A proper young lady of Taos 
            Had her panties trimmed neatly with lace. 
                But a vulgar young man 
                Raped her roughly, and ran, 
            And left them pure panties in chaos. 

               There was a young girl of high station 
               Who ruined her fine reputation 
                    When she said she'd the pox 
                    From sucking on cocks--- 
               She should really have called it "fellation."

Have you heard of young Franchot Tone 
               Who felt of his own peculiar bone? 
                    It was long and quite narrow 
                    And filled full of marrow, 
               And less edible than stale corn pone. 

                                        So here was this fellow from Strensall, 
                                        Whose pecker was shaped like a pencil, 
                                                      Anemic, 'tis true, 
                                                      But an interesting screw, 
                                        Inasmuch as the tip is prehensile.