"At a seance," said a young man named Post, 
            "I was being sucked off by a ghost; 
                Someone switched on the lights 
                And there in guaze tights, 
            On his knees, was Tobias mine host."

For sculpture that's really first class 
               You need form, composition, and mass. 
                    To do a good Venus 
                    Just leave off the penis, 
               And concentrate all on the ass. 

               There was a young choirboy from Devon 
               Who was raped in a haystack by seven 
                    High Anglican priests--- 
                    (Lascivious beasts)--- 
               For of such is the kingdom of heaven 

               A geologist named Dr. Robb 
               Was perturbed by his thingamabob, 
                    So he took up his pick 
                    And whanged off his wick, 
               And calmly went on with his job. 

There was an old curate of Hestion 
            Who'd erect at the slightest suggestion. 
                But so small was his tool 
                He could scarce screw a spool, 
            And a cunt was quite out of the question.