The doctor said to the housewife,
"I've got good news and I've got bad news.
The good news is you don't have PMS.
The bad news is - you're a bitch!"

What are the three words you don't want to hear while making love?

"Honey, I'm home!" 

What's the difference between Bill Clinton, and the Titanic ??

It is known how many went down on the Titanic.

What's the fluid capacity of Monica Lewinsky's mouth?

1 U.S. leader 

While out one morning in the park, a jogger found a brand
new tennis ball. Seeing no one around that it might belong
to, he slipped it into the pocket of his shorts.

Later, on his way home, he stopped at the pedestrian crossing,
waiting for the lights to change.

A girl standing next to him eyed the large bulge in his shorts.
"What's that?" she asked, her eyes gleaming with lust.

"Tennis ball," came the breathless reply.

"Oh," said the girl sympathetically, "that must be painful. I
had tennis elbow once."