Ventriliquist cowboy walks into town and sees Indian sitting on his porch.

Cowboy: Hey, cool dog. Mind if I speak to him?

Indian: Dog no talk.

Cowboy: Hey dog, hows it going?

Dog: Doin alright.

Indian: [extreme look of shock]

Cowboy: Is this your owner? [pointing at Indian]

Dog: Yep

Cowboy: How's he treat you?

Dog: Real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food, and takes me
to the lake once a week to play.

Indian: [look of disbelief]

Cowboy: Mind if I talk to your horse?

Indian: Horse no talk.

Cowboy: Hey horse, how's it going?

Horse: Cool.

Indian: [extremer look of shock]

Cowboy: Is this your owner? [pointing at Indian]

Horse: Yep

Cowboy: How's he treat you?

Horse: Pretty good, thanks for asking. He rides me regularly, brushes me
down often, and keeps me in the barn to protect me from the elements.

Indian: [total look of amazement]

Cowboy: Mind if I talk to your sheep?

Indian: Sheep Lie!!

Grant's Bar and Casino:

     Liquor in the front, 
     Poker in the rear. 

A girl sat sobbing in the police station. "I was raped by an Italian."
She wailed.
"How do you know it was an Italian? The detective asked.
"I had to help him," the girl replied.

Q: What's the quickest way to a woman's heart?
A: Straight through the rib cage.

   A lady with a large flowery hat was stopped at the church door by the
   usher. "Are you a friend of the bride ?" he asked.
   
   "Certainly not," she snapped, "I'm the groom's mother."