Titicons
   (.)(.) tiny tits
   (o) (o) regular tits
   ( O )( O ) big tits
   ( @ ) ( @ ) big harry tits
   ( ' ) ( ' ) perky tits
   {.} {.} shriveled tits
   ( , ) ( , ) drippy tits
   [ _ ] [ _ ] android tits
   ( # ) ( # ) Tysoned tits
   

   A man's wife had been in a coma for several days following a
   particularly nasty knock on the head. As usual, one of the nurses in
   the hospital was giving her a wash in bed. As she washed down the
   woman's body, she sponged her pubic hair. Out of the corner of her eye
   she thought she had seen the woman's eyebrows shudder. Not quite sure,
   she tried again. This time, she actually did see some movement.
   
   "Doctor, Doctor," she called, "I saw some movement!"
   
   The Doctor came in to the room and tried as well. Once more, they both
   saw movement around the woman's eyes.
   
   "Well this is good news," said the Doctor. "I think we should call her
   husband and let him know."
   
   Anyway, they called her husband and told him that they had seen some
   movement. When he arrived, they explained that by touching her pubic
   hair, they were seeing some sort of reaction in her facial muscles.
   The Doctor suggested that the husband may like to try something a
   little more adventurous in order to provoke a stronger reaction. "I
   suggest that we leave the room and that you try a little oral sex," he
   said.
   
   The husband duly agreed and so he was left alone in the room. Several
   moments later, all the emergency alarms and buzzers were activated.
   The Doctor and a host of nurses ran in to the wife's room where they
   saw the husband zipping up his jeans.
   
   "Oops," he said, "I think I choked her."
   

Q: What do you get when you cross a Jewish American Princess with a 
computer?

A: A computer that never goes down on you. 

It had taken him several months, but the executive vice president
had finally persuaded his new secretary to bend over the back
of his leather couch and allow him to have sex with her that way.
"And just where have you been until this hour?" demanded his wife,
when the wayward husband finally arrived home.
"Down at the office," he replied, "working like a dog." 

   On the eve of the couple's tenth wedding anniversary, the still slim
   wife was bragging about her figure. "You know honey," she said, "I can
   still get into the skirts I had before we were married."
   
   "Yeah ?" the husband replied as he turned his attention back to the
   ball game on TV. "I wish to hell I could."