Suit Alleges MS Racism
Software Linked Black Couple to Monkeys 

The Associated Press
S A N   D I E G O,   June 30 — A lawsuit accuses Microsoft of including a
“racially-charged” message linking black people to monkeys in its 
Publisher 1998 software. The company has agreed to alter the program. 
     John Elijah, 32, filed the suit Tuesday in San Diego federal court,
claiming users will see images that include a black couple sitting on
monkey bars when they type “monkey” to access pictures of the animal. 
     “I felt the blood rushing out of my whole body,” said Elijah, a black
construction worker who was shown the image by a co-worker. “I was
humiliated.”

Several years ago, we had an intern who was none too
swift. One day she was typing and turned to a
secretary and said, "I'm almost out of typing paper.
What do I do?" "Just use copier machine paper," the
secretary told her. With that, the intern took her
last remaining blank piece of paper, put it on the
photocopier and proceeded to make five "blank" copies.

Two members of the Lothian and Borders traffic police were out on
the Berwickshire moors with a radar gun recently, happily engaged
in apprehending speeding motorists, when their equipment suddenly
locked-up completely with an unexpected reading of well over
300 mph. The mystery was explained seconds later as a low flying
Harrier hurtled over their heads. The boys in blue, upset at the damage
to their radar gun, put in a complaint to the RAF, but were somewhat
chastened when the RAF pointed out that the damage might well have
been more severe. The Harrier's target-seeker had locked on to the
'enemy' radar and triggered an automatic retaliatory air-to-surface missile
attack. Luckily(?) the Harrier was operating unarmed.