In the woods a saw a rabbit with a candle making shadows of people on a 
tree.

                                           - Steven Wright

A lot of people ask me if I were shipwrecked, and could only have one 
book, what would it be?

I always say How to Build a Boat 

                                             - Steven Wright

"The length of a film should be directly
related to the endurance of the human bladder." 

Alfred Hitchcock. 

"I was recently on a tour of Latin America,
and the only regret I have was that I didn't
study Latin harder in school so I could
converse with those people." 

    - J. Danforth Quayle, former U.S. Vice-President 

"Why Windows NT Server 4.0 continues to exist in the enterprise would be a
 topic appropriate for an investigative report in the field of psychology or
 marketing, not an article on information technology."

-- John Kirch, http://www.kirch.net/unix-nt.html