There was a young man of Manhasset 
               Whose life seemed excessively placid. 
                    One day, just for fun, 
                    He raped an old nun, 
               And filled up her crevice with acid. 

I love you, You love me,
Homosexuality,
People say that we're just friends,
But we are really Lesbians.

  

Part 1 of 12
   
                    There was a young fellow from Sparta,
                            
                    A really magnificent farter,
                            On the strength of one bean
                            He'd fart God Save the Queen,
                            
                    And Beethoven's Moonlight Sonata.
                            

On his honeymoon sailing the ocean 
               A tightwad displayed much emotion 
                    When he learned, one fine day, 
                    He'd been fucking away 
               What could have been bottled as lotion. 

There once was a woman from Wheeling
Who had a funny feeling
So she laid on her back
And tickled her crack,
And peed all over the ceiling!