A young girl who was no good at tennis
But at swimming was really a menace
Took pains to explain,
"It depends how to train;
I was a streetwalker in Venice."

When she wanted a new way to futter 
               He greased her behind with butter; 
                    Then, with a sock, 
                    In went his jock, 
               And they carried her home on a shutter. 

There was a young lady named Ames 
               Who would play at the jolliest games. 
                    She was great fun to lay 
                    For her rectum would play 
               Obbligatos, and call you bad names. 

Seven wise men with knoweldge so fine,

Created a pussy to their design.

First was a butcher, smart and with,

Using a knife, he gave it a slit.

Second was a carpenter, strong and bold,

Using a hammer and chissel, he gave it a hole.

Third was a tailor, tall and thin,

With a piece of red velvet, he lines it within.

Fourth was a hunter, short and stout,

With a piece of fox fur, he lined it without.

Fifth was a fisherman nasty as hell,

He threw in a fish, and gave it a smell.

Next came a pretcher whose name was McGee,

Touched it and blessed it and said it could pee.

Last came a biker, dirty little nut,

Sucked it and fucked it and called it a cunt.


Sent by Christine

There was a young lady named Gloria
Who had sex with Sir Wilfred DuMoria,
Then with 26 men,
Sir Wilfred again,
And the band from the Waldorf- Astoria.